"The Mission"

For my Elementary Spanish class, I have had to watch a few movies depicting the culture and history of Spanish-speaking regions of the world.

My first movie that I watched was entitled “The Mission.” It is about the story of the Jesuit missionaries in South America who tried to save the native Guarani Indians and their missions from the Portuguese takeover of previously Spanish territory.

The movie begins with a Jesuit settling a mission named “San Carlos” in a remote part of the South American jungle. He falls in love with the indigenous people and brings Christ to them in action, in education, and in sacrament. After having brought many native Indians to the Church, a cardinal from the Holy See comes to visit South America, to formally “reign in” the Jesuits on the continent so as to “preserve the [Jesuit] order throughout the world” from the political unrest of Europe. This causes the Guarani to try to defend their missions, but in the end, they lose what they had fought to preserve and their lives.

This movie was so moving for me on many levels. The first was how absolutely selfless the Jesuit missionaries were in their care for and love of the Guarani. Sacrificing homeland and worldly things, they sought to bring Christ to the natives by showing His love to them.

What struck me next was the unbelievable and inhumane detachment that the Europeans held for the Guarani, seeing them as either in the way, or as slave labor. This struck me particularly because the Europeans involved were from nominally Catholic countries – Portugal and Spain.

The most moving part of the movie came to me at the end. The last scene portrays the Jesuit priest holding a monstrance being followed in procession by the Guarani as they are being shot at by Portuguese military. The priest is shot and killed, falling to the ground with the Monstrance holding our Lord. Immediately, a Guarani man rushes to the priest and picks up the fallen monstrance, continuing the procession. What faith!

Eucharistic Hymn of Praise

For my Intro to Bible studies class, we were asked to write a hymn of praise... here's my shot at it:

Alleluia! Indeed, Praise the Lord!

You who gaze upon His veiled Self;

Who kneel before His royal majesty;

Who bow your being in His Presence.

You who are fed with Living Flesh;

Who are cleansed with running streams;

Who are healed by the physician’s ointment.

For it is indeed God Who is veiled!

He Who is crowned with glory!

He Who is the “I Am!”

It is indeed God Who feeds you with His Body;

He Who cleanses you with His Blood;

He Who heals you with His loving care.

Alleluia! Indeed, Praise the Lord!

St. Damien Catholic Church in Oklahoma City

http://www.newsok.com/article/3498132

Redemption -- A Mystagogical Reflection

“All have sinned…”

My life is a sinful mire; a swamp of doubt, anger, lust, greed…. It consumes what is right and just and vomits out defilement and perdition. I no longer see the images of youth and beauty that once graced my soul. Those things have passed from me as quickly as the words “I will not serve” from the ethereal lips of Lucifer. Apathetically, I continue in my ways of damnation. In blatant disregard for my very soul, I dance with evil, allowing it to lead me where it will. “Pleasure! You satisfy me like nothing else! And you, Concupiscence! You guide me so eagerly and quickly!” I know I lie to myself; I know that beneath the sheepskin of fulfillment lies the wolf of enslavement and death.

“All… have fallen short…”

In a moment of clarity amidst my deranged stupor, I begin to struggle against my chains. I moan and reel from the self-inflicted damage within myself. I lean against the bonds of my sin, using all of my might to break them… nothing. I collapse again into my mire; I envelop myself with self-pity and false justifications. “I can’t help it! I have to do the things I do. I can’t overcome them; so they must be God’s Will.” With a swift juxtaposition, my mind renders my chains into merely extensions of my being; irrevocable and natural. My delusions give me purpose – my sin is my right! The glimmer of Truth vanishes once more… waiting for me… waiting…

Truth…

Again my opiate of sin is dampened enough for conscience to take hold. I see around me the scandal that I have caused, the riches that I have plundered, the hate that I have maintained internally for my own being. I feel the piercing lance of morality. I see the sins I have committed by deeds of wickedness or postures of dishonesty as nails in my hands and feet that have fastened me to my damnation. My humanity trickles out of me like blood from an open wound. “Why have I forsaken myself? How can I recover? My way has led to my destruction.” I cringe at the state of my soul, and wonder if You, Lord, could ever redeem such sin.

“Truth shall set you free!”

Awakened to my sin, and with the realization of my helplessness, I turn to You. Like a deer panting for the running streams, I yearn for the Master’s release. Like the prodigal son, I return to You and seek Your mercy and forgiveness. You take my chains of death, my nails of sin, my wounds of weakness; you take my bloody and wretched humanity… You take it, and You redeem it! You raise my dead soul to life; You bring me, a sinner, pardon and peace; You illuminate my darkness! You restore my freedom, not so that I may be a slave once more to sin, but so that I might joyfully fulfill my true mission: to know, love and serve You. Lord, You have opened my lips, so that my mouth may proclaim Your praise. Indeed I will ever praise You, and give You thanks, for You have made me a child of Light! Glory to You, my Lord and my God, for You have truly set me free!

Prayer for Spiritual Reflection

Gracious God, give me intimate understanding and relish of the truth. Help me to enter with total generosity toward you. I offer you my entire will and liberty, that Your Divine Majesty may dispose of me and all I possess according to Your most holy Will.

Teach me to make an effort without tension, within grace, where you are present -- into a deep and beautiful silence/retreat. I ask you to communicate Yourself to me and to inflame me with Your love and praise, and to dispose of me for the way in which I can better serve You in the future.

Amen.

The Call to Humility: St. Benedict’s Twelve Steps

Excerpt from the "Regula Sancti Michaelis" (Articles of Formation)
Order of the Legion of St. Michael

129. A Sermon from St. Benedict–The Twelve Steps to Humility: Holy Scripture proclaims to us brothers: "Everyone who exalts himself shall be humbled, and he who humbles himself shall be exalted" (Lk 14:11). It tells us that all self-exaltation is a form of pride, against which, the prophet tells us, he guarded: "Lord, my heart us not exalted, nor are my eyes lifted up; neither have I walked in great things nor in wonders above myself. But to what purpose if I did not think humbly but exalted my soul? As a child weaned from his mother, so will you reward my soul" (Ps 131:1-2).

130. Therefore, brothers, if we wish to reach the highest peak of humility and soon arrive at the heavenly heights, we must, by our good deeds, set up a ladder like Jacob’s, upon which he saw angels climbing up and down. Without doubt, we should understand that climbing as showing us that we go up by humbling ourselves and down by praising ourselves. The ladder represents our life in the temporal world; the Lord has erected it for those of us possessing humility. We may think of the sides of the ladder as our body and soul, the rungs as the steps of humility and discipline we must climb in our religious vocation.

131. The first step of humility is taken when a man obeys all of God’s commandments–never ignoring them, and fearing God in his heart. He must constantly remember that those who fear God will find eternal life while those who scorn Him will be cast into Hell. He must continually guard himself against all sins of body and spirit, and deny himself the fleshly lusts.

132. He should know that God sees him always. No matter where he is, everything he does is reported to God by the angels. The prophet proves this when he says that God is ever present in our thoughts: "God searches the hearts and mind" (Ps 7:9). "The Lord knows the thoughts of men, that they are vain" (Ps 94:11). Also, "You have understood my thoughts from afar" (Ps 139:2), and "The thoughts of man shall confess to You" (Ps 76:10). Let the prudent monk–so that he may avoid evil thoughts–always say in his heart: "Then I shall be spotless before Him, if I shall keep myself from my iniquity" (Ps 18:23).

133. We are forbidden to do our own will for we are to "Leave (our) own will and desires" (Eccl 18:30), and "... beg the Lord in prayer that His will may be done in us" (Mt 6:10).

Thus we learn not to do our own will for Scripture warns us: "There are ways that seem right to men, but they lead, in the end, to the depths of hell" (Prv 16:25). We must fear what was said of the careless, "They have been corrupted and made abominable in their desires" (Ps 14:1). And we must believe God is present even in our bodily desires, for, as the prophet says, "Lord, all my desire is before You" (Ps 38:9).

134. Thus we must guard against these evil desires, for death is near the doorway to pleasure. As Scripture commands us, "Chase not after your lusts" (Eccl 18:30). Therefore, if "The Lord sees both good and evil" (Pv 15:3), if He is always searching out the sons of men to find those who dwell on or seek God, and if our every move is made known to Him by the angels assigned to us–then, brothers, we must always be on the lookout, as the prophet warns us in the psalm. Let us fear that the Lord may say to us in the future, "Thus have you done, and I have been silent," if He should see us falling into evil ways and becoming useless–even though He may spare us for a while, because He is honorable and waits for us to reform.

135. The second step of humility is reached when a man, not loving his own will, does not bother to please himself, but follows the injunction of the Lord: "I came not to do my own will, but the will of Him who sent me" (Jn 6:38). It is also said that "self-will has its punishment, necessity its crown" (Acta Martyrum).

136. The third step of humility is attained when a man, from love of God obediently submits to a superior in imitation of the Lord. As the apostle says, "He was made obedient unto death" (Phil 2:8).

137. The fourth step of humility is reached when a man, in obedience, patiently and quietly puts up with everything inflicted upon him. Whether these are painful, unjust or even against his nature, he neither tires nor gives up, for the Scripture says, "Only he who perseveres to the end shall be saved" (Mt 10:22) and "Let your heart be comforted, and expect the Lord" (Ps 27:14). To show that the faithful must suffer all, no matter what, for the Lord’s sake, the psalmist says, "For you we suffer death all day long; we are considered as sheep for the slaughter" (Ps 44:22). Secure in the hope of Divine reward they rejoice, "But in all things we overcome by the help of Him Who has loved us" (Rom 8:37). ...

138. The fifth step of humility is achieved when a monk, by humble confession, discloses to his abbot all the evil thoughts in his heart and evil acts he has carried out. The Scripture tells us to do this: "Reveal your way to the Lord and hope in Him" (Ps 37:5). Also, "Confess to the Lord because He is good, because His mercy endures forever" (Ps 106:1). ...

139. The sixth step of humility is reached when a monk contentedly accepts all that is crude and harsh and thinks himself a poor and worthless workman in his appointed tasks. He must say with the prophet, "I have been brought to nothing, and did not know it. I have become like a beast before You, and I am always with You" (Ps 73:22-23).

140. The seventh step of humility is attained when a man not only confesses that he is an inferior and common wretch but believes it in the depths of his heart. He will humble himself and say, with the prophet, "I am a worm and no man, the reproach of men and the outcast of the people" (Ps 22:6). ...And, "It is good for me that You have humbled me, so I may learn Your commandments" (Ps 119:71).

141. The eighth step of humility is reached when a monk only does that which the common rule of the monastery and the examples of his Elders demands.

142. The ninth step of humility is achieved when a monk, practicing silence, only speaks when asked a question, for, "In many words you shall not avoid sin" (Prv 10:19). And, "A talkative man shall not prosper upon the earth" (Ps 140:11).

143. The tenth step of humility is reached when a man restrains himself from laughter and frivolity, for "The fool lifts his voice in laughter" (Eccl 21:23).

144. The eleventh step of humility is arrived at when a monk speaks gently, without jests, simply, seriously, tersely, rationally and softly. "A man is known by few words" (Pv 10:14).

145. The twelfth step of humility is reached when a monk shows humility in his heart and in his appearance and actions. Whether he is in the oratory, at the "work of God," in the monastery or garden, on a trip, in the fields; whether sitting, standing or walking — he must think of his sins, head down, eyes on the ground and imagine he is on trial before God. He must always repeat to himself, "Lord, I a sinner am not worthy to lift my eyes to heaven" (Lk 18:13). And, "I am bowed down and totally humbled" (Ps 38:8).

146. When a monk has climbed all twelve steps, he will find that perfect love of God which casts out fear, by means of which everything he had observed anxiously before will now appear simple and natural. He will no longer act out of the fear of Hell, but for the love of Christ, out of good habits and with a pleasure derived of virtue. The Lord, through the Holy Spirit, will show this to His servant, cleansed of sin and vice.

The Trouble with Angels

I just watched one of my favorite movies, entitled " The Trouble with Angels." It's the story of two young girls who go to an all-girl school run by nuns. On a deeper level, its the story of a vocation that was heard, regardless of the noise of life -- noise that we ourselves may cause.

The first time I saw this movie, I was in college... yes the baptist college. A group of my friends invited me to their house and said: "You've just got to see this Catholic movie that we found! You'll love it... cuz you're Catholic!" This was about two years ago. At the time, I did enjoy the movie, but I think I may have overlooked one of the principal messages of it, which, as I mentioned before, is that of the call of vocation. I watched it and enjoyed it because it represented an important thing to me: the Church.

Now that I've watched this movie again, in my room at St. Meinrad as a seminarian for the Archdiocese of Oklahoma City, I find myself reinforced and encouraged in my vocation to the priesthood. Just as the movie alluded to on many occasion, we are all called to a path in life, be that marriage, priesthood, or religious life. Yet we are not called to yield to our vocation in a passive sense. Rather, we are called to grasp it -- to choose it wholeheartedly. We are called to love our vocation!

Another thing I gleaned from this movie is the importance of my relationships that I create here in seminary. There is a scene in the movie about the death of one of the sisters. She is the closest friend to the mother superior. Before the funeral Mass, as the coffin is alone in the chapel, Mother Superior kneels next to the casket, in front of our sacramental Lord. She embraces the casket and weeps because of the lose of her sister. It is an intimate and truly fraternal love that they shared. Although I have only been in seminary one semester, I already feel this type of fraternal love growing among us here. it is something I cherish deeply, as do so many here at St. Meinrad.

If you are someone who is questioning your vocation, whatever it may be, or are still discerning God's path for you, I highly encourage you to see this film. Even if you are confident in your state in life, watch it, and you may understand a little better why some of us have chosen the path less taken. God Bless you.